the past me

its been a LONG LONG LONG 8 months plus. to think of 'the me' for the past 8 months there had been drastic changes that i never ever in my life imagined i could do it. details of my past or how stupid i was or how flirt i was isnt the main point in this entry.
i dont wanna spill the beans on such issues. rather i'll jus emphasize on how GREAT i am to actually overcome such many many obstacles during this 8 months.
i think im great that i actually be able to learn from my so-called 'mistakes' and to change into a whole new person is another great thing i managed to do. some ppl do recognise the faults, but well they just dont feel like changing for the better however. well im just GREAT. tats how i see myself. but im QUITE sure that SOME ppl who read this will just direct themselves to the toilet bowl and vomit la.
EVERYTHING, rather ALMOST EVERYTHING is back to normal. okay EVERYTHING, hopefully. and i just love the way it is now. i PROMISE myself not to get into any kind of trouble! unlike the past.. well except for the studying part it isnt normal. just to clarify that okay! (im no mugger boy!)
but i start to miss st gabs. i mean not that i love being an ass and spend my time doing all sort of nonsense. (and i REALLY mean nonsense.) but i love the spirit there. its just something that is currently lacking in this school. not complaining about the lack of school spirit, it isnt the school spirit thing that is lacking anyway. i think its the adventurous spirit that is lacking. i think.
to think of my previous life in st gabs, all i've been doing is doing things that are wrong, but not really breaking the law or school rules, rather more of those things that are in the grey area, not something that is obviously black or white. andi admiti used to be MUCH daring than i am now. i remembered bringing those HUGE armchair to my class to sit while others have those typical plastic kopitiam chairs, even the teacher oso those plastic chairs and that the teachers all looked at me with that armchair and i just didnt bother at all. and all the stripping, the spraying paints or SOME OTHER THINGS, the crazy stuff that is 'feasible' to be carried out in the parade square.
in short, yes this 8 months made me grew into a better person, better equiped for the future society, but the so-called 'youth' within me died. it just died like that. THAT i really dunno is it something i should be happy or sad about.